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Luciec
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35 weeks pregnant and partner left for another women

Feb 12th, 2017, 10:01 AM   #1
 
35 weeks pregnant and partner left for another women
My partner of 15 years who we share two other kids with who are 3 and 6 upped and left on New Year's Day to move in with his new women
I am 35 weeks pregnant which we planned and I have to have a c section on 3 weeks
He is out drinking and loving life whiles I'm struggling to not think about him every second.
We were planning our wedding only a few months ago and I don't understand how another women can make him forget all of our time and history together
I offered him regular time to see his other children but he made excuses why he couldn't,ignored their calls but then send messages telling me I'm ruining his relationship with his older children
He also now is saying how he want to be in the delivery room when the baby is born but I have a feeling it's to try and make it uncomfortable for me!
How can he just stop loving me whiles I have his unborn baby living in me not once has he asked how baby or I am coping
Sorry about rambling just so lost and confused
 
 
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Jaydn
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Feb 13th, 2017, 00:23 AM   #2
 
I am so sorry u are going thru this especially at this stage. I know how hard and scary it must be for u right now. I really do hope that u have some support other than ur ex. He sounds heartless as does a woman who wad break up ur family. If u have someone please lean on them for support.
you will definitely need someone to help with the kids, etc after ur C-section. I hurt for u and wish u all the best going fwd.
 
 
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Blueclass
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Feb 13th, 2017, 00:46 AM   #3
 
Oh my God this is so so heart breaking. What a awful situation for you and must be scary. I had a c section and you definitely need help for a good while after who will help? I can't believe a woman would go after a man who is about to get married and have a baby with plus already have some. My friend is currently going through the same she is due in April and have one baby together already. He met this girl from America whilst playing x box and has said his leaving England to go there to be with her, it's crazy.

All I can say is be strong you deserve so so so so much better and when he sees the grass is not greener on the other side I hope you kick him to the curb. He does not deserve you or the kids, what a horrible and weak man. They should both be ashamed of themselves.

As for the delivery of your baby you decide who is in the room with you and if you tell them not to let him in they wont. Think carefully about it as you need to be calm nd it's the first time your see your little one, do you want him there and potentially ruining it for you or do you have him there in hope it will make him see he should be with you..... I guess it's a hard question only you can answer. For me it would be no his not allowed in, he lost that right when he left and how could I ever trust him after this I couldn't. There's plenty of men out there who will look after your kids when your ready to be with someone again. Someone who will love, cherish and make you feel like the woman you deserve to feel like.

Where are you from, I'm wondering if there's support groups ect.... id love to take you for a coffee and give you a big hug. X
 
 
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Luciec
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Feb 13th, 2017, 11:16 AM   #4
 
I know I couldn't do it to another pregnant women but they are living together and he says he's never been happier which kills me!
We were actually happy and in a loving relationship right up to the day he walked out and I feel like it was all fake he now says he hasn't loved me for 6 years so the whole time we had our children
He's barely bothering with our 3 and 6 year I offered him days where he could see them and he turned it down yet he used to see them every single day!how can he just change so much so quickly.
I probably want him there in the hope he realises what he's lost but not once has he asked how this baby is or how I am so I know that won't happen but he acts like this baby isn't even happening and I want him to see what he actually has lost and then have to live with that!
Whiles I'm sat at home crying and caring for our boys he's out drinking and partying with her and acting like we never exsisted my whole family can't believe it either as he spent Xmas with us all laughing and joking
I have a gut feeling his new girlfriend is also pregnant and he's just planning to raise that baby and forget ours
 
 
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Blueclass
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Feb 13th, 2017, 20:39 PM   #5
 
What makes you think she is pregnant? It's just awful I feel for you so much. Where are from x
 
 
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Luciec
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Feb 14th, 2017, 07:22 AM   #6
 
The way he talks about how special and how he talks it's like he wants me to ask if she is but I don't want to know cos that will be the worse thing to hear right now whiles I'm still carrying his baby!we love in Hampshire
 
 
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Blueclass
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Feb 14th, 2017, 20:08 PM   #7
 
I got married in Hampshire, Everley. Im surrey but takes me 45 min to get there. Yes that is not what you need right now. What does his family say about all this? How long has he been seeing this tart for?

This may not be what you want to hear right now but keep any correspondence you have with them if you was to get divorced you can prove what his been up to and it will go in your favour. Id screw him for everything so that the kids and I have it all. X
 
 
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Luciec
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Feb 15th, 2017, 08:13 AM   #8
 
I have no clue as he won't say how long just that he loves her but my birthday was end of November and We were looking at wedding venues and he picked our wedding song and I don't even know if any of that was truth or guilt
His family never liked me due to is having kids out of wed lock and never meet our boys and they are super happy we are no longer together which doesn't help
I just feel so lost without him around as he really was my best friend we did everything together and it's like he's just replaced me as if I never mattered at all
 
 
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Blueclass
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Feb 15th, 2017, 10:46 AM   #9
 
I can understand that. Who's going to help after a c section xx
 
 
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cassi
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Feb 17th, 2017, 07:54 AM   #10
 
Sorry, I didn't want to read and run I just feel so awful for you. What a horrible disgusting man he is to do that. He doesn't sound like he has any morals at all . Focus on you, is there anyone who can stay with you and help? In the meantime apply for CSA so he's supporting his children money wise. I'd try and completely block him out for a couple of weeks, help rest your mind and take control away from him. He obviously just thinks you're sitting there at his beck and call despite him acting like a class A asshole. In fact, there is no words for what he's doing try and find another focus for a bit just so you can relax as much as possible in this situation for yours and the babies sake xxx
 
 

 
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Luciec
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Feb 18th, 2017, 08:56 AM   #11
 
In his head I am completely in the wrong and he has done nothing wrong and I can't get my head around that how he thinks he's done nothing wrong to me
I have had to completely block him as he's just so hurtful and I just need answers to why he's don't this now but he won't answer and that hurts so much
He's not asked about our baby once the whole time and I feel so sad about it how can he not care what happens to this baby he knows it's his I really believed we would be together forever I just feel so stupid as he obviously never cared about me at all
 
 
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Blueclass
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Feb 18th, 2017, 10:19 AM   #12
 
He needs a serious kick up his arse. I know it easy for me to say but you need to try and focus on you, kids and your baby. All this stress is not good for either of you. X
 
 
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cassi
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Feb 23rd, 2017, 11:37 AM   #13
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Luciec View Post
In his head I am completely in the wrong and he has done nothing wrong and I can't get my head around that how he thinks he's done nothing wrong to me
I have had to completely block him as he's just so hurtful and I just need answers to why he's don't this now but he won't answer and that hurts so much
He's not asked about our baby once the whole time and I feel so sad about it how can he not care what happens to this baby he knows it's his I really believed we would be together forever I just feel so stupid as he obviously never cared about me at all

he's emotionally abusing you. He knows he's in the wrong but it makes him feel better to blame you and have control. His new relationship won't last with him like that and when it ends you can tell him to bugger off when he comes crawling back. The best thing to do is completely ignore him, let him know he's not in control and you're not just going to take the blame and be wrapped around his finger. Focus on you, someone much better will come along one day xx
 
 

 
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honeybear
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Feb 23rd, 2017, 12:06 PM   #14
 
Hey hun didn't want to read and run,
I'm so sorry your going through this, my partner didn't exactly leave me for another women but left me for majority of
My pregnancy even though I had complications. He never turned up at the hospital or the scans so I understand how much it hurts and makes you question everything.
If he's met another women .. we won't go into how much of a tramp she is but she may not keep him either when realising he could do that to you nothing to stop him doing it to her as well.
It hurts and feels like it won't get better but as some the other girls have said best thing you can do is ignore him once he doesn't have that control they feel lost,
I would also make a point before hand in saying his kids can judge his behaviour themselves when they are old enough. Your children have a mummy who loves them and provides for them including this little baby whose only needed you so far. Pregnancy hormones are a nightmare with situations as well. Keep your family close and friends, find a new birthing partner he should not have the option to do this to you and forget about his kids but be there and ruin your magical moment.

You'll have your day when he tries to come back and you'll realise somehow you managed without him, I hope it goes ok with your little one
Sending my love
 
 

 
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Luciec
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Feb 24th, 2017, 14:00 PM   #15
 
Thanks for your reply I keep hoping I'll wake up one day and feel better but I think until I have this baby it's so hard to heal knowing that he no longer wants this baby.
Apparently his new women and him have discussed our unborn baby which when he told me hurt me so much that some other women can do that to another pregnant women I feel like they are both laughing knowing that the pain they have caused me!
I'm just hoping once baby arrives it's my fresh start and really hope one day he regrets how he treated my two boys and how he treated this innocent unborn child
It is just so hard when my 6 year old asked why daddy doesn't see him anymore and I don't know what to tell him as I know he's hurting and Not one phone call or visit for them it's like he is a complete stranger and not the man I ever I ever loved
He said the whole 15 years he never loved me and is now so in love and happier than ever
 
 
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