My dad has never really bothered with me throughout my whole life, him and my mum weren't together for very long after I was born and I mainly saw him at weekends, then stopped seeing him altogether when I was around5/6.

He wrote me a letter when I had turned 18 wanting to meet up which I ignored and then his wife added me on facebook when I was 19 and I agreed to meet up with him. I didn't really like the person that he was, he was nothing I thought he was and everything my mum said although she encouraged me to meet him as he may have changed. In reality he was all about money(which he didn't really have but would throw at me on every occasion) showing off, and unashamedly lying to my face about my family and things that didn't matter. Anyway he became jealous over my relationship with his sister (who he doesn't speak to) and the christmas before last we had a really big row and I saw his childish side and we decided not speak and leave it at that. As I don't remember him being around ever it's not really bothered me as he is a stranger and you never want what you've never had etc etc...

When I told his sister I was pregnant in march this year her eldest son told my dad in conversation and he just brushed it off and carried on talking about his new car he was getting. I was not at all surprised by this and relieved in a way as I wouldn't have wanted him trying to make the effort with me now, I'm 22 and it's kind of too late and I've seen firsthand what he is like.

When Charlie was born 3 weeks ago I didn't even think about my dad or ask his side of the family about him but his sister came to visit yesterday and told me that her eldest had told him about me having a baby and that it was a boy etc and all he had to say was 'I'm not interested, I've got a lot on with work and the kids at the min'(he has 3 other daughters who are all in primary school)


But, WTF?!?!?! He has a LOT ON? Who's to say I have any interest in him?? grrr I was soooooo annoyed, not so much for me but just for Charlie, he is the most sweetest well behaved gorgeous baby and my dad just brushes him off like he's nothing???

I wouldn't have let him be a regular part of Charlie's life anyway, I don't trust him enough to stay around and be a grandad, so I was thinking if he'd have wanted to see him I'd have let him see him once and then after that I'm not so sure but obviously he doesn't want to meet his first grandchild. grrr what a d*ck. He just isn't human at all > : (


I so wish I could just make him angry and wind him up like he has done to me!!

Don't really know what to say but it sounds like you are both better off without him x x

It's a shame. I'm in a very similar situation to you too, although my mom and dad lives together until I was 16. I never saw him, he was always working, in the pub or having affairs! I found out about his affairs when I was 13, he was sleeping with someone's mum who I went to school with, so that got round and I was bullied about it and my mom didn't believe me, it took them another 3 years to split up!
Ever since then I made the effort and called him once a week but as of late I've given up. I moved in with my OH a year ago, only round the corner from my dads and he's been round once in 2 years! He never bothers to call me and has made absolutely no effort while I've been pregnant.
Plus he's never apologized for anything he did.
I know I'm better off without him, he's let me down enough and I don't want to allow him to do it to his grandchild too.

It's him thats losing out by not making any effort hun, not you
x

stick to your guns hun, only see the people you want to see xx

Oo I want to smack him for you! Too long of story but I have a usseles father same sort if sitution and I swear you are right, they are just waste of space! I can understand you wanna annoy / upset him too!

thanks ladies...I've calmed down a bit now lol, I just can't understand why he wouldn't want to see him, he's an innocent baby for goodness sake. I hope one day he comes crawling back I'll be there telling him where to shove it xx

It's your protective parent instinct kicking in x

our fathers arent dad's they are sperm doners nothing more nothing less my kids see my father because he lives next door to thier school and he gives them money often but personally i cant be bothered with him cause of his drinking and if im preg with a girl i have a good reason for him not being in her life ( women arent his fave breed of people ) sometimes we are better off without them and they are insignificant really and so not worth getting upset over.