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PF Savvy
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: South Staffs
Posts: 641

Not his fault but he;'s an easy target

Dec 17th, 2008, 14:29 PM   #1
Since having Alex I feel like I've given Tim ,my ten year old such a hard time. We've had some really serious financial worries and he's just the easiest one to shout at. The financial stuff is nearly sorted now but I just seem to get mad with him so easily. He does things which I find really irritating and I end up screaming or crying at him. I try not to but its just like I lose it. I am gonna end up messing with his head if I carry on like this and he's gonna end up hating me. Anyone got any suggestions about how I can get a bit more control of my emotions. Its not his fault, its me, I'm such a bad mom.
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PF Addict
Join Date: Nov 2007
Posts: 6,822

Dec 17th, 2008, 15:33 PM   #2
I don't have any advice but I think your right to look to get help. I don't think your a bad mam at all but it isn't fair to take our stresses out on LO's.. good luck
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Join Date: Oct 2007
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Dec 17th, 2008, 20:49 PM   #3
I dont know if this will help but i had this when i had lou she was 5 at the time, and she was so use to being the center of my world that she would do things just to get attention and it drove me nuts!

I felt like you that i was constantly getting at her for no real reason, i expected her to do a bit more, like get herself dressed in the morning or brush her own teeth 1st before i checked them or pick up her own toys silly little things that at the time i thought was resonable but thinking about it i had never expected before iykwim. It took a few months of this before i realised that i was expecting to much and started running round after her again as well as a new baby. It nearly killed me i was constantly exausted and never had enough time to do things for me like have a bath.

You need to find the middle ground, new babys are eventfull and not always in a good way. I got round it by spending time with kate when Lou was in bed doing home work or playing with her barbie just something for an hour or so that was just me and her. So she got 1 to 1 attention. I bought her new books (not expensive) so we could read together (she is an excellent reader now) most importantly i learnt patience, because what i expected of her wasnt always what she could do. You definatly not a bad mum and busy one maby but never bad a bad mum would just let it all carry on. Huge
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easy, fault, target

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