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blondie101
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Surname help!

Jan 4th, 2017, 08:50 AM   #1
 
Hi guys

So me and my partner have been together for 2 years and we have had a little girl. I'm unsure which surname to give her. At first I was going to give her his but my dad mentioned putting it in mine. I'm unsure whether to give her mine and change it if/when we get married or still put it as his. We have spoke about marriage and it is something that we want to do at some point I am also thinking if worst case scenario if we split and I meet someone else etc. I have asked partner and he doesn't mind what surname the child should have and will go with whatever I want to do. We have agreed not to have it doubled barrelled.

Any advice? It's driving me nuts!
 
 
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Angie27
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Jan 4th, 2017, 15:27 PM   #2
 
Personally I think you should go with your own if he doesn't mind - you can change it if you get married
 
 
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snowbee
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Jan 4th, 2017, 16:06 PM   #3
 
I would use my surname if I wasn't married. As the primary care giver I would want to have the same name as my child. If we then got married and I changed my name I would also change the childs. One of my friends really regrets having a different name to her children when they were small, until she said about it, it wasn't something I had given much thought to.
 
 

 
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JulyBug
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Jan 5th, 2017, 11:28 AM   #4
 
I have been with my partner for over ten years, we are not married or planning to be but my baby will have his surname.

I personally don't think it matters, I will still be mum no matter what their surname is! lol

xx
 
 

 
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MrsS15
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Jan 6th, 2017, 17:08 PM   #5
 
I wasn't married when I had my son but I'm very traditional with a child having a dads surname, my partner (at the time) wouldn't have entertained it being any other way lol. We're now married so it's worked out perfect! I always think if heaven forbid you were to split up and the child had your surname, what if you married someone else? Your child wouldn't have the same surname as Mum or dad. Least the father will never change their surname just totally my opinion though xx
 
 

 
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PeanutButter
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Jan 9th, 2017, 23:10 PM   #6
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by MrsS15 View Post
I wasn't married when I had my son but I'm very traditional with a child having a dads surname, my partner (at the time) wouldn't have entertained it being any other way lol. We're now married so it's worked out perfect! I always think if heaven forbid you were to split up and the child had your surname, what if you married someone else? Your child wouldn't have the same surname as Mum or dad. Least the father will never change their surname just totally my opinion though xx
But the child will still have the name of the dad? He'd still be the dad if they split up.. my mom and dad split up and I have my dad's name (well did matried now), and my mom got with another guy, that doesn't make me want to change my name because my mom is seeing someone else, my dad will still be my dad. (I can't tell if i misread your post, please corrct me if I did aha!!) Xx

I think it just depends on the situation etc, if you're planning on staying together and getting married why not put it in the dad's name? Personally I think there'd be some dobut in the relationship if you think oh, nah we might break up one day (don't get me wrong, I get break ups happen all the time).
 
 

 
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MrsS15
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Jan 10th, 2017, 00:45 AM   #7
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by PeanutButter View Post
Quote:
Originally Posted by MrsS15 View Post
I wasn't married when I had my son but I'm very traditional with a child having a dads surname, my partner (at the time) wouldn't have entertained it being any other way lol. We're now married so it's worked out perfect! I always think if heaven forbid you were to split up and the child had your surname, what if you married someone else? Your child wouldn't have the same surname as Mum or dad. Least the father will never change their surname just totally my opinion though xx
But the child will still have the name of the dad? He'd still be the dad if they split up.. my mom and dad split up and I have my dad's name (well did matried now), and my mom got with another guy, that doesn't make me want to change my name because my mom is seeing someone else, my dad will still be my dad. (I can't tell if i misread your post, please corrct me if I did aha!!) Xx

I think it just depends on the situation etc, if you're planning on staying together and getting married why not put it in the dad's name? Personally I think there'd be some dobut in the relationship if you think oh, nah we might break up one day (don't get me wrong, I get break ups happen all the time).

You have hun we're agreeing with each other! I'm meaning if a Mum were to give the child her surname and then she splits from the dad and marries someone else then the child won't have Mum or dads name. At least having the fathers surname he'll never change it as you said. Maybe I wasn't very clear but I totally agree with you xx
 
 

 
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PeanutButter
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Jan 10th, 2017, 17:44 PM   #8
 
Oh aha! Just me misreading stuff. I read it as in have the dads name, then split and get with someone else.. then basically say the bio dad isn't the dad anymore lmao xx
 
 

 
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MrsS15
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Jan 10th, 2017, 18:10 PM   #9
 
Hahaha no not at all!! Xx
 
 

 
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