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toni64539
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Three year old not eating, please help!

Sep 27th, 2014, 18:43 PM   #1
 
Hi ladies, sorry I don't get on here very often anymore these days, never seem to have the time but I desperately need help! The situation with my 3 year old Solomon is getting worse and worse. He's never been a massive eater, as in always had small portions, and naturally were all kinda slim as a family. He's always eaten a good variety of foods, loves his fruit and veg etc, but it's like he is just not interested in eating at all now, even if you give him his favourite he will just say "no, don't want it"
I took him to the docs last week as he had a bad bout of dioreah(sp?) and was worried that he's eating so little anyway I don't want him to lose any nutrients he gets and so they weighed him and he weighs exactly the same as he did the last time he was weighed,,,,,,,, a year and a half ago!!!!! He has not put on an ounce, and for a growing three year old I was in shock! I burst into tears, doc didn't seem over worried, just reccommended I speak to health visitor and I have an appointment next week but it's getting worse daily and I feel I have tried everything, I can't think of anything the health visitor could say that I haven't tried to get him to eat. My 18 month old eats double what Solomon eats but today he seemed not bothered about eating and I'm worried he's picking up on his brothers behaviour. We all just dread mealtimes now, as soon as I even say "Tea time" Solomon bursts into tears!!?? And we try to be happy and light and airy so he doesn't pick up any bad vibes, we've tried ignoring him, simply letting him get down from table if he doesn't want to eat, tried, rewards, and sadly tonight my husband just snapped, we were all eating tea and Sol was just crying as soon as he sat down saying "don't want it, don't want it" but just sobbing and my husband just turned to him and shouted "JUST SHUT UP NOW AND EAT YOUR TEA" so loud that we all leapt a mile and all started crying, including my husband, he just left,,,,, feeling guilty for loosing it and just the worry is awful! It's like he is starving himself and I feel everything we do to try get him to eat is just going to give him an eating disorder. Please somebody help! I can't bare the worry, and I can't bare my little boy being so sad all the time. Thank you in advance for your help xxxxxx
 
 

 
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wifeywifey
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Sep 27th, 2014, 18:55 PM   #2
 
Im sorry I have no advice any suggestions you likely have tried and I haven't been in your situation however didn't want to read and run. Im sorry it must be so stressful for you. If hv can't help and it doesn't get any better keep going back. You know your child best and doctors don't always take us mums serious enough. X hugs x
 
 
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toni64539
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Sep 27th, 2014, 19:10 PM   #3
 
Thank you wifeywifey, it really is so stressful and I think making me ill too. I have to get it sorted. Thank you x
 
 

 
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mummyofdragons
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Sep 27th, 2014, 19:13 PM   #4
 
The fact he's crying at meal times shows he's picking up on the stress of it all too.

Perhaps try and make meal times and eating less formal. I am a big believer in eating meals at the table as a family, but I find some times my LO eats better when he can graze on the go. I leave stuff for him in a bowl when he's playing and let him pick at it.

How is he with drinks like milk? You can get what are basically like protein shakes for kids which would at least help get some calories and nutrients in to him.

One thing to consider is your own approach and attitudes to food as your son will pick up on this too. You say you're all naturally slim, do you all eat regular meals, eat together, and eat the same as one another? I had a friend who was a serial dieter, ate little and always ate separate meals to her family, and then couldn't understand why her children never wanted to eat.
 
 

 
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toni64539
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Sep 27th, 2014, 19:39 PM   #5
 
Thank you mummy of dragons very helpful, we're all good eaters, all eat the same meal at same time and deff not serial dieters, and I try not to show any stress but obviously can't be any good at it. I will try leaving little bowls of snack, a previous HV told me not to give snacks as that would stop him eating his meals but things have moved on since then and getting calories in him in anyway is more important, thing is what to give him as a snack that he will eat!? He is ok ish with milk (sometimes) yes I was thinking of that complan stuff. Just want him to put on weight and be happy xx
 
 

 
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Mrs M
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Sep 27th, 2014, 21:28 PM   #6
 
How about a picnic? My daughter loves them, and we even have them in the front room on a blanket. Or maybe something in front of the TV? It sounds to me as though you need to break the cycle a little bit and try something you don't normally do. How about a sandwich or some toast on a plate on his lap while watching a film?
 
 
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OMGbabyno3
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Sep 27th, 2014, 22:18 PM   #7
 
I was going to suggest what Mrs M did. Or how about a mini party? Sausages, sausage rolls, cucumber, cake? Could put so,e music on on as Saturday afternoon and have a kink family party? Good to see if he'll eat in different situations.

Have you tried getting him involved in cooking? Putting meat, veg, cheese etc on a pizza base? Baking cakes?

Good luck xxx
 
 
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HL28
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Sep 27th, 2014, 22:42 PM   #8
 
My little one hardly ever eats a meal unless it's pasta and that's only on occasions. She's funny with textures so at the minute she seems to go through fruit and veg pouches like no tomorrow. She's a snacker that's for sure and I don't think I'd stop the snacks in an attempt to make her rat dinner because she'd be so grumpy and not sure it would help to be honest. Does he like the fruit pouches? I know they're for younger kids but Plum do a fab range with fruit and veg and quinoa for example. I'd try just leaving snacks around and dent make a big deal just tell him they're there and leave him to it. Hope the HV can be more helpful xxx
 
 
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Flickalicious
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Sep 28th, 2014, 07:14 AM   #9
 
I'd get in contact with a dietitian hun, one that has experience with children. Doctors and HVs can advise too of course but by the sounds of it you really need a specialist before it gets to be quite serious xXx
 
 
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Holi
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Sep 28th, 2014, 09:19 AM   #10
 
Does your lo go to nursery/day care/grandparents house? How does he eat for them? Do you find he eats better when your out than when your at home (my sister finds this with her lo!)

Maybe get him involved in the prep of the meals - ask him to pick what you have? I would continue with meal time, sit him at the table and plate him up food, but completely ignore his eating and just talk. If he doesn't eat anything I wouldn't make a fuss. Then I'd have lots of snacks available throughout day.

It's so stressful when they don't eat. My lo is only 14m and when she was solely on milk she hardly had anything and had poor weight gain - now she is on solids she's a lot better but we still have days when she decides she won't hardly eat!

How longs it been going on for? Xx
 
 
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mummyofdragons
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Sep 30th, 2014, 20:25 PM   #11
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by toni64539 View Post
Thank you mummy of dragons very helpful, we're all good eaters, all eat the same meal at same time and deff not serial dieters, and I try not to show any stress but obviously can't be any good at it. I will try leaving little bowls of snack, a previous HV told me not to give snacks as that would stop him eating his meals but things have moved on since then and getting calories in him in anyway is more important, thing is what to give him as a snack that he will eat!? He is ok ish with milk (sometimes) yes I was thinking of that complan stuff. Just want him to put on weight and be happy xx
My LO loves fruit so I leave him bowls of grapes, chopped apple or pear, or orange segments for him.
 
 

 
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